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Enjoy !

New warming lubricants
July 17 - 2006

Try the new warming lubricants (available in CVS and other phramacies) They enhance sexual arousal by heating up the skin upon contact. If your partner is female rub a few drops on the top of her clitoris.

A male partner would enjoy this warm sensation on his testicles and his perineum (the area between the testicles and anal opening).

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Talk to her!
July 10 - 2006

Verbal reinforcement is particularly important for women. Unlike male sexual arousal, female responsiveness depends less on visual stimuli and more on her emotional state and the situational ambiance. In our society which idolizes perpetual youth and often sets unrealistic beauty standards, many women feel insecure about their looks and self-conscious about their naked bodies. When a woman does not feel sexy she is unlikely to be in the mood for sex. To increase her sexual responsiveness, tell her that you find her beautiful and sexy, that she turns you on and that you want to enjoy every part of her body before making love to her.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Avoid Spectatoring
July 3 - 2006

To fully enjoy sex, it is necessary that we train our minds not to over-think, not to worry or ruminate about "am I doing this right?" or "what should I be doing next?" or "what does he or she think of me?" Much of the enjoyment of sex comes from the suspension of mental self-evaluation in our abandoned pursuit of pleasure in touch, feel, smell, and sight. Scrupulous self-scrutiny during sex is one of the greatest obstacles to experiencing its magic as one cannot be both an eager participant and a concerned observer, an ardent player and a critical arbiter. So stop "spectatoring," e.g., worrying about your messed up hair, sweaty body, or smeared make-up, or the shape of your breasts or the size of your penis. Chances are it is the last thing your lover is thinking about.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Keep it light!
June 26 - 2006

As a general rule, you should start your explorations with light rather than heavy stimulation. Many people find light touching, brushing or tickling of the surface of the skin to be even more erotic than a harder touch. While tolerance for heavier stimulation increases with sexual excitement, this higher pain threshold plummets immediately after orgasm. Thus, the pressure of touching should always be varied; and even the touch of gentle hands can be varied by stroking the body from head to toe with different materials, such as a fur, a silk scarf, a soft brush, or a feather.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Have a Fruity Time!
May 22 - 2007

To add playfulness to your sex life, buy vegetables and fruits that resemble sexual organs, or that have acquired erotic significance, such as bananas and mangoes, and slowly, passionately consume them in front of your lover, deliberately stimulating them with your lips and tongue as you would his or her sexual organ. It is especially effective when done, unabashedly, in public or in front of a stuffy ceremonious waiter in a formal restaurant. The subtle suggestion of sexual desire in a public place triggers an even greater release of adrenalin followed by those pleasure hormones, as it combines sex with the exciting fear that others will understand the "private" signals being transmitted. Even during private sex play, you can call attention to your favorite erogenous zones (such as the belly button) with his or her favorite fruit (such as cut up star fruit or grapes) and tell your lover that his or her desert is ready. Or smear your body with fruit and whipped cream and tell your partner to lick it off.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Eliminate his anxiety
May 15 - 2007

Similar to a woman's insecurity about her body, men are plagued with concerns about their penis size and their capacity to satisfy their lover. Because, historically, men have been the initiators of sexual activity and the more active partners during sex, they have come to believe that their performance is critical to the success of the engagement; and for this reason, performance anxiety is as common for men as body attractiveness is for women. Indeed, because the elimination of this anxiety is in and of itself pleasurable to men, for many men it is just as rewarding to satisfy their lovers as it is to be satisfied themselves.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Tickle Me Gently
May 8 - 2007

Many individuals enjoy tickling and tickle torture (others find it to be a turn-off). Tickling is often used in combination with bondage in BDSM play. A more erotic form of tickling is called "pattes d'araignee," or literally translated from French "spider's legs." It is done by using the tips of the fingers for the lightest possible touch, aiming to touch not the skin but the tiny skin hairs, not on the genitals but on other sensitive areas such as the chest, belly, insides of arms and thighs, armpits and the back. The idea is that the extreme lightness of the touch is more electric and erotic, like a light breeze brushing over the skin.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Necking is Nice
May 1 - 2007

For most women, the nape of her neck and her upper shoulder areas are very sensitive and a trigger to her arousal. Pay special attention to the line from the back of the ears, down the sides of the neck and over the muscle that runs to the end of the collarbone. You can use kisses, hand caresses or tongue strokes down this line; and it will send shivers of pleasure through her whole body - and the bodies of many men too! Little "love bites" or sucking with a whole mouth are also good here. Indeed, this practice is so common that the neck and shoulders are the primary places where lovers give each other a "hickey," or a bite mark, which is formally known as a "passion purpura" in medical literature. Some women even find this as exciting as stimulation of the "G-spot." If your partner is particularly responsive to the stimulation of the neck and shoulders, you can even try harder stimulation by sinking your teeth into the shoulder muscle while gently grabbing and pulling his or her hair.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

The scent of sex
April 24 - 2007

Pheromones contribute to our decisions as to whom we find sexually attractive, without our conscious awareness of their effect. Although scientists are not sure of the exact effect of pheromones on human sexual behavior, the pheromones of other animals help them distinguish females from males and signal when it's time to mate. Preliminary pheromone studies have shown that human pheromones may work in similar ways. For example, men who sniffed T-shirts worn by women who are ovulating--the part of the menstrual cycle when women are most likely to get pregnant--found the scent more pleasant and sexy than the smell of women in less fertile stages. Women with irregular menstrual cycles who took a whiff of male sweat several times a week found their cycles grow closer to an average, regular length. The most recent study by University of Pennsylvania researchers demonstrated that pheromones in male perspiration reduce tension in women, putting them in profoundly better moods. A dose of male sweat applied to the upper lip of the female subjects reduced stress, induced relaxation, and raised hormone levels normally associated with ovulation. So don't go overboard with colognes and anti-perspirants in your attempts to attract a mate! These odor-masking substances cover up the natural pheromones that serve to attract the opposite sex.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Nothing is improper
April 17 - 2007

Don't let outdated ideas of what is "proper" as far as sex is concerned inhibit your sexual expression. As it has been said, the only "unnatural" sexual act between consenting adults is one that they cannot perform. Our notions of what is right or wrong, normal or bizarre, acceptable or forbidden, have continually changed over the years. There was time when the medical community believed that acts of self-eroticism caused blindness, and lawmakers considered any extra-vaginal penetration to be sodomy, a felonious offense. So do not let someone else's prescription of right and wrong dictate what is right or wrong for you and your partner, or to hinder your sexual creativity. If you are both adults not suffering from a psychotic disorder, and an act originates from the desire to please and be pleased rather than to hurt or injure, if it feels good for both you and your partner, then it is an act worth trying.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

The ears have it
April 10 - 2007

Besides being an important sensory organ, the ears are also very sensitive to touch. Kisses on the ears, especially in back of the ears, or a light tracing of the ear's folds with a finger or tongue tip are good ways to stimulate your partner. Nibbling on the ear lobes, or even lightly blowing into the ear, is also enjoyable. Some lovers enjoy even prolonged tonguing of the ear and find it very arousing; but all lovers--both men and women--enjoy having their ears kissed and fondled during sex.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Keep it Constant
February 27 - 2007

Most women reach orgasms from repetitive and continuous stimulation, as opposed to hard or varying pressure. So treat her moans and sighs as signals for continuing at the same pace, not as requests to go harder or faster. On average, a woman can take anywhere from 3 to 30 minutes to reach orgasm from oral stimulation, so be patient. If your tongue gets tired, take a break and use your finger or penis to keep her arousal level from dropping. When she starts to come, keep whatever technique you are using going at the same pace, and don't stop until she tells you to! Don't feel too disappointed, though, if she doesn't reach climax, as she will have enjoyed it anyway. Unlike male orgasms, female orgasms are more elusive; and most women understand that and usually do not blame the man for failing to produce one. They are always grateful that he has tried.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Tasty Treats
February 20 - 2007

A lot of couples like to add their favorite flavors to the pleasure of oral sex, using everything from chocolate to spicy condiments. Using a menthol cough drop in the mouth while sucking on the clit is especially arousing, as it imparts a bite of coolness to the suction and can produce a tingling sensation. Others use ice in the mouth to produce an even colder sensation, or hot pepper sauce on the lips to add some burning sensation to the fire in your lapping. An even bigger smorgasbord of flavors is available to make oral pleasuring tasty, with honey, various fruit syrups, whipped cream, and chocolate being the most popular. Just be sure to keep the sugary concoctions and the ice on the outside of the vulva and the clitoris, and not let them get inside the vagina itself where they may cause yeast infections or damage delicate tissues.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Deep Throat
February 13 - 2007

With the movie "Deep Throat" being in the spotlight again, it is only appropriate to mention the art of "deep throating." According to Linda Lovelace, the most comfortable way to achieve a deep penetration is if your throat is straight. The best position is with the receiver lying on his back with the giver lying on her stomach along side. Make sure there is sufficient lubrication - an erect penis will slide much easier along the tongue and into the throat if it is well lubricated. Once you're in position, slightly tilt your head back and extend the tip of your tongue just past your bottom lip. Flatten the back of your tongue just as you would if a doctor were using a tongue depressor to look in your throat. Contrary to popular belief, do not try relaxing your throat muscles while performing deep throat; instead, force the back of your tongue down to create a larger opening for the penis to enter. Some who mastered the art of deep throating can also perform so-called "throat massage" by making swallowing motions while the penis is in the throat. The recipient's pleasure can be intensified by licking his testicles in the same time. You can also let you partner ejaculate with the entire length of his penis in your throat This way you will avoid the taste of the ejaculate because the head of his penis will be past the taste buds on the back of your tongue.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Danger and sex
February 6 - 2007

Our brain can be fooled in mistaking danger-induced anxiety for a sign of sexual interest and excitement. Psychological studies have shown that people put in life-threatening situations, such as those meeting on a shaking bridge, were more likely to find each other sexually desirable than those who met on a steady ground. Thus, by manipulating our brain to experience a little anxiety during sexual activity we can enhance our sex life when it becomes too predictable or stale. This can be done in a wide variety of ways from joining the mile high club to adding elements of voyeurism, exhibitionism or BDSM to your sex play.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

It's Bigger Than You Think
January 30 - 2007

Many men are concerned with the size of their penis, both in terms of whether it measures up to those of other males and whether it is capable of satisfying a woman. Penile size is to men what breast size is to women, i.e., a part of the anatomy that has an effect on self-esteem which is disproportionate to its real importance as far as sex is concerned. This anxiety may become intensified by the visual effect called foreshortening. Every man sees his own penis in a foreshortened view because looking down on it makes the penis appear shorter than it is. That is why when he compares his penis to those of other men in a shower or changing room, his penis does not fare well in comparison. To get a better estimate of your penile size, look at yourself in the mirror instead of looking down. If you are overweight and have a belly, losing weight will make you appear more endowed (some claim that for every 35 pounds you gain, your stomach engulfs an extra inch of your penis). Shaving the genital area will also make your penis stand out and look larger.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Creative Use of the Feet and Toes
January 23 - 2007

Some men enjoy receiving "foot jobs;" that is, having their penises rubbed and stimulated to orgasm by a pair of female feet. It takes some dexterity to be able to maintain both feet in tight contact with the penis while moving them back and forth; and plenty of lube should be applied to the penis first to reduce friction. Another common sexual use of the feet is the "toe job," where a man uses his big toe to stimulate a woman's nipple or clitoris or even to insert in her vagina. Needless to say, whenever you engage in foot play, you should first be sure that your feet are clean and that your toenails are trimmed and buffed to remove any sharp edges.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

The Male Pelvic Exercise
January 16 - 2007

Men can benefit from exercising their pelvic muscles by gaining greater control over their erections and learning to delay ejaculation. The male pelvic muscle is felt to be around the base of the scrotum; and men can learn to contract this muscle in the same way as women learn, by practicing cutting off the flow of a stream of urine. Some men are able to achieve amazing control over their pelvic muscles, as demonstrated by the theatrical production "Puppetry of the Penis: the art of genital origami," in which two Australian men showcased their ability to do various genital gesticulations, such as completely withdrawing their penis into their pelvic cavity. But gaining control over this muscle is more than an impressive party trick, it allows a man to stop the flow of seminal fluid into the penis, delaying ejaculation and prolonging intercourse.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

A Touch of Wax
January 9 - 2007

Blindfolds are often used on the submissive to prevent him or her from seeing what is coming next, as surprise is also adrenaline-producing and stimulating. For example, dropping goblets of candle wax on your blindfolded, bound partner is especially exciting as he or she cannot tell where the drops will fall next. Just be sure to test the heat of the wax on your hand first, to make sure it is not too hot, and remember that the higher the wax falls, the cooler it gets. Also, never drop wax on the face or directly on the genitals (but the areas around them are fair game).

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Sensory Deprivation
January 2 - 2007

Sensory deprivation works on the premise that depriving us of one of our sensory inputs increases the sensitivity of the others. Blind people often develop increased tactile sense. In the movie "At First Sight," Mira Sorvino falls in love with a blind massage therapist whose supersensitive touch turns her on. Depriving one of the sense of sight is one of the best ways to increase tactile awareness and build up light anxiety and anticipation.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Kudos for the CAT
December 26 - 2004

To increase the chances of your woman reaching an orgasm, try "coital alignment technique" or CAT. This is sometimes described as "riding higher in the saddle," as it involves the man sliding his pelvis higher on the woman's body so that his pubic bone (which is the horizontal bone immediately above the penis) is brought into direct contact with her clitoris. In addition, the man should shorten his stroke, rocking forward and back rather than fully withdrawing and thrusting. Each forward and backward movement should be only far enough to rub her clitoris with his pubic bone.The obvious significance of this position is that it provides maximum clitoral stimulation for the woman and assists her in achieving orgasm.

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

Discover New Erogenous Zones
July 24 - 2006

During foreplay, try discovering new erogenous zones. The underside of the wrist, elbow and knee are much underutilized areas. Due to thinner skin, these areas very sensitive to light kisses and caresses, often to great surprise of the recipient!

Have a great time!
Dr. Z

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